Weasling my Way Out

I asked a weasel... she obliged.

Dear Wiley-

i was on this date the other night, and while most of the conversation flowed quite nicely… i let slip something about why i don’t like soy products. big mistake!

i tried to back out of it - to say something frivolous and just let it slide. but my foot was firmly planted in mouth.

he pressed on - was he feigning interest? he said he was genuinely interested. I knew better - i knew that explaining the truth (my truth, at least) would be a bad idea.

I really need to learn how to skirt the issue delicately -to just play it off like nothing was mentioned.

sure it’s ok for me to talk about these things with friends, with people who already know me - we get into interesting exchanges of ideas…

but with people i’m meeting for the first time? never again!

Dear No Tofu-

You must keep telling your truth. If it resonates, he’s worth seeing again. However if you say you don’t want to talk about it, maybe another time, and he won’t stop- he’s a douche. He should respect a lady’s boundaries.

If they ask, go for it. If they are too pushy, simply say:

Hey, what is the max bandwidth on your email, dude? I’ll send you my dissertation on the subject.

Or

Dude, I’m taking my foot outta my mouf now and gonna put it up your butt.

But, some guys might like that too much.

Then ask if he’s heard the latest on Jamie Lynn and Brit. Skirted and skirted.

For solutions to your random problems:

Weasels have been advising man kind since the dawn of time. Where do you think the idea of weaseling your way out of something came from, huh?

Send us your questions and we will have Wiley Weaselle answer them or other guest weasels will tell you the secrets of life let you in on how to get out of whatever bind you got yourself into.

We will tell you how to do what is … right.

Go ahead. Ask away. No question is too large or too small.

Email us at lifebehindthesmogcurtain@gmail.com with your questions and ponderings.

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Off the Grid

I'm now on disc 7 of 13 of the Omnivore's Dilemma. It is such an interesting journey. Seriously - I can't recommend it enough! Please go out and read it, or get the audiobook and listen to it.

I was almost looking through my closet for things to iron just to continue ironing while listening! yeah, yeah - i have no idea where this recent love for ironing came from.... i'm just going with it.

Have I mentioned that I want to run away from this city life and get off the grid and live on a farm and raise goats & chickens? sounds familiar. if i didn't mention it here, i know i mentioned it several times. maybe if i say it enough times, it will come true? like how since the age of 34, i've been saying i was 35 - and it finally happened... hmmm...

I got a text one day a couple of weeks ago from my dear sweet friend Flyn... he suggested we run away together and get married... how i wish that was possible! I'd just visited him recently. he lives in petaluma, CA now... and what does he have on his property (his mom's actually)... 3 sheep, 2 lambs, and a huge vegetable and fruit garden! He wants to come back to hollywood and i want to go to some place exactly like where he is. I wish he'd get better already. I miss him so much. his eyes used to smile. they don't smile any more. all the pain meds (and pain) have dulled the life out of him. sigh.

West Hollywood Farmer's Market

I discovered a Monday option!

Well, I've known about it... but today I finally tried it - it's at Fountain & Vista - Monday from 9am to 2pm.

It's a small one - like the Larchmont Sunday market. Not overwhelmingly crowded either (yay!)

It's been a while since I last went to any farmer's market... I've been out of the loop. all that housesitting just takes me out of my routine - and once the routine gets interrupted, it takes a while to get back on it.

There were so many gorgeous looking tomatoes and squash - and squash blossoms too. Lots of stone fruit... not much in the berry department - that season is fading away...

but i don't like tomatoes too much and i didn't feel like having squash... but I got broccoli ($1.50/lb.), white peaches (freestone), o'henry peaches (freestone) and pluots (mix&match $2.25/lb) and grapefruit ($2/bag - about 6). I generally prefer nectarines to peaches but i like anything with a free stone (as opposed to cling).

I've been avoiding large crowds of people lately... the hollywood market is such a clusterf**k - that i just didn't want to deal. but after listening to 5 discs worth of the Omnivore's Dilemma, I felt like I had to go.

How to Skirt the Issue?

There is an art to it... skirting the issue...

I wish i was better at it.

case in point: I use this blog to talk about things, shed the light - if you will - about issues that are rather global in scope... but also talking about the steps I'm taking, and hopefully encouraging someone else to take - at trying to be a solution to the problem.

that being said: I don't want to talk about these issues discussed herein!

why?

because i come across looking like a complete kook!

i was on this date the other night, and while most of the conversation flowed quite nicely... i let slip something about why i don't like soy products. big mistake!

i tried to back out of it - to say something frivolous and just let it slide. but my foot was firmly planted in mouth.

he pressed on - was he feigning interest? he said he was genuinely interested. I knew better - i knew that explaining the truth (my truth, at least) would be a bad idea.

I really need to learn how to skirt the issue delicately -to just play it off like nothing was mentioned.

sure it's ok for me to talk about these things with friends, with people who already know me - we get into interesting exchanges of ideas...

but with people i'm meeting for the first time? never again!

that was thursday... still haven't heard from him...

oh well.
whatevs.
next.

I've heard the problems... what's the solution?

I like audiobooks.

I don't feel as guilty just sitting and reading a book. I can do chores such as cleaning or ironing or working out while listening to something i'm interested in.

I'm listening to "An Omnivore's Dilemma" by Michael Pollan.

While only on disc 3 of 13, I've learned how the Industrial Military Complex is driving our agricultural system, why corn has taken over, and how absolutely depressing this all is. Of course, I've completely over-simplified this... the whole big picture would be impossible for me to convey without regurgitating everything from the book... you'll just have to read it.

So what's the solution?

Where is one to start? I listen to this, get depressed... feel completely impotent - how can my changes have any effect on the world?

And despite all I'm saying here on this blog, when I'm "out" - be it eating-out, out-of-town, out-on-the-town, out-at-a-friend's house... I'm always finding ways of cheating my own principles.

I make allowances that I can't expect everyone to change because of what I say... but then when left to my own devices - outside of my home - I just make allowances.

Recently I started drinking Whiskey again. I made the switch from those yummy raspberry kamikazes and/or tequila for some silly reason. I was dressed very "vamp-y" one night at the gallery, and a vamp wouldn't drink a kamikaze - she would drink whiskey. But whiskey is made from corn.

Now I'll be damned if i stop having a libation whilst at the gallery. I tried to develop a taste for gin a while back. can't do it. I also don't tolerate liqueurs too well either... so what can I switch to now?

And pretty much the only mixer at the bar that doesn't have High Fructose Corn Syrup is Dole Pineapple Juice... Ok... I guess i'll have to search for a new drink...

Wow - leave it to me to make a link from audiobooks to what I'm gonna drink from now on.

Unclear on the Concept

Google's AdSense thingy that puts those windows with advertisments based on my content isn't quite getting it right.

Currently, the ads are for Soap ingredients - featuring Palm Oil. (imagine me rolling my eyes right now).

As much as I would love for everyone to click on the ads on my page, to perhaps generate some sort of income for myself...

Please don't buy the Palm Oil.

Thanks.

Seafood watch

I am prone to feeling guilty... about a lot of things... perhaps it's my Jewish heritage?

When I shop for groceries, I get especially conscientious. Although when I go out to eat, many of my principles go out the window - just because I really have no control over someone else's purchasing choices. but i digress...

My friend Gavin gave me a copy of the West Coast Seafood Guide 2008 when he went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium. He obviously "gets" me.

With my cheat sheet in hand, (you can view your own regional copy here) I went to Santa Monica Seafood to get some fish. I handed my card to the guy who was helping me, and asked him to show me some fish from the green column - ahem - the affordable ones... Pacific Halibut is a great fish... so expensive. Same with king salmon...

I'm not a fan of Red Snapper. I never remember this when I go shopping. I'm such a newbie with fish. All I really know is Black Cod (which I do with this Miso Glaze), Salmon (wild caught) - which I'm used to cooking now... and Tuna in a can (which I try to limit due to mercury concerns)...

But everything else... I'm clueless. I bought some Tilapia too. Haven't figured out how I want to cook it yet. But it's inexpensive, safe on my list, and I know i've had it before and liked it.

It's been a while since I've been to a farmer's market. I'm feeling disconnected. I miss the fresh fruits. Though Lucy's fig trees have been full of fruit & i've gotten my fill for the summer. I miss apples. I'm looking forward to the local apple season.

Quote of the Day

It is the duty of every citizen according to his best capacities to give validity to his convictions in political affairs

-- Albert Einstein

More Customer Dis-Service

Even when you know what you want...

... getting it can be a challenge.

Case in point: I had to get a video game for a friend's birthday. I was lagging and EB Games had just closed 5 minutes earlier. Doh!

Friday night, I'm all dressed up - it's 8:05pm... I dash off to Best Buy hoping they have the game.

I know the layout (the corporation dictates it)... I head to the game section. But I don't see the games for Nintendo Wii...

Me: Excuse me, where are the games for Nintendo Wii?
Clerk#1: The cashier gets the games for you. They are locked behind the checkout stands.

ok... I go to the big long grey cage behind which are the much coveted and often nicked games that must be caged for their protection. But instead of the games & other wares being behind glass beckoning us to purchase them - they are behind a cage... tedious to look through.

Me: Is there someone who can show me the Wii games?
Clerk#2: No, I'm sorry I don't have the key - only the cashier has the keys. you'll have to get in line.

Fine. I get in line - empty handed.

After about 5 minutes, it's finally my turn.

Me: I'd like Mario Galaxy for the Nintendo Wii.
Cashier: (hesitant) ok.

After about a minute, she returns empty handed.
Cashier: There aren't any out there, I called up the storage to see if they have any in inventory.

At this point, a customer she'd already assisted had returned to get some credit applied or to finalize his transaction.

Then she turns to me...

Cashier: Since they are checking on inventory, I'll have to help the next people in line.
Me: Wait - I'm not done! Isn't there anything else? I need to get a game.
Cashier: I'm sorry - I'm just the cashier
Me: But you're the only one who can help - you're the only one with the key.
Cashier: There's a long line - I have to help the next people.
Me: I WAITED IN LINE - I WAITED MY TURN! (i'm not shouting or anything - but i was firm)
Me (cont'd): What's the next most popular game? I don't know these things - I'm a girl - what do the guys like?
Me (cont'd): C'mon, I need your help - just show me the selection and I'll pick something - I'm not going back in that line.

I'm obviously not some slacker just moving from my couch to get a game to play for a night in. I'm dressed up for the bar/gallery - I don't have all night to just wait... I wanted to get in there and out as quickly as possible.

She concedes and takes me to the cage.

What do I see staring me in the eyes? Super Mario Galaxy.

Me: There it is - Isn't that the game I asked for?
Cashier: oh.
(wow - what a dolt! - rather than argue the point any further i hurried things along)
Me: Ok - done - I want that game - ring me up.

That took all of 2 seconds for me to spot it. If she'd done her job in the first place, I'd have been out of there 5 minutes earlier (that includes her fruitless search, her argument with me, and the other customer she helped in the meantime).

Seriously... If I hadn't known the name of the game I wanted... I wouldn't have gotten any customer service whatsoever. Even knowing what I wanted didn't ensure rapid service.

If Best Buy really cared about it's customers, it would start by treating their employees better - so that they would care and stay with the company and know what they were doing... I'm sure they have such a high turnover of employees that everyone is simply clueless - left hand doesn't know, let alone care about what the right hand is doing.

Pretty Clean

I love the cleaning products from Mrs. Meyer's Clean Day product line. I just placed an order for some online... since most stores don't carry the entire line - and this way i won't have to drive around town to get the scent I want for the specific product.

Take the Geranium scent - I love it for ironing, and in the bathroom... but not in the kitchen. Lemon Verbena - I love it as a dish soap, but never for laundry products. Strange how picky I can be.

Besides, why should cleaning products smell so 'chemically'. Like Windex or Pine Sol... they knock me out with the fumes.

Unfortch, their bar soap has palm kernalate and other palm derivatives... therefore I didn't get any bars of soap. I'll keep searching.

My friend Megan is creating a line of hand made soaps, and I have some designs I want to do. But if I'm putting my name on any of them... you can be damned well sure that I'll look into all the sources and get the best earth-friendly, eco-friendly materials... and make them smell and look pretty too! If you can't find better, then do it yourself, right? Be the change...

Orders? I'll keep you posted.

Oh - and packaging! It should be pretty on the outside as well as on the inside (and eco-friendly)

Darned Principles!

I made some pretty bold statements along the way on this blog.

There are some issues I truly believe in and don't want to break if I don't have to.

Others, I just have to bend the rules to accommodate for ease of everyday life (e.g. eating meat that's not fed grains, getting a new cell phone, computer parts...)

But yesterday, as I was wrapping up my stint of house sitting, I had to re-stock the pantry and fridge according to the list that was left for me.

Issue: Palm Oil (and all it's derivatives - palm kernel oil, palm shortening, palm kernalate...)

It's pretty ubiquitous. I find it in soaps, crackers, cookies - lots of places!

Why is it bad?

Apparently, farmers are burning down the natural habitats of Orangutans, Sumatran Rhinos & other endangered species in order to plant more of these palm trees for the said oils. I must confess, I haven't done my own personal research into this, I first heard of this issue in an article from the L.A. Times a few months ago.

If there's an easy substitute, I'll grab the alternative.

However I didn't want to waste too much time that was not on my dime at the grocery store reading the backs of packages.

Carrington usually has some sort of cookies available for snacks. I wanted to re-stock her supply because being the cookie monster that I am, I devoured quite a few. Couldn't find any.

I'm a good baker. I can make cookies. So I baked some. 2 batches.

now i'm gonna break out because I ate some... and they had butter.

why do I do this to myself? damned principles!